BOY STORY 2

Tuesday, 27 March 2012

Howdy Cool Cats,

As much fun as I have showing you my clothes, I feel a bit like constant outfit posts are (1) a bit lazy, and (2) not entirely what you guys signed up for. Don't get me wrong, I could put on slightly odd get-ups and coerce my pals into taking photos of me looking dorky and awkward for ever, but according to my stats page, what you guys really like is when I pen type down my neuroses and reveal to the Blogosphere what a mental person I actually am, particularly when it involves my love life. So here goes. A little bit more about the boy (If you missed the original post, you can see it here).

It's been going... Well? I'm not entirely sure. We've been seeing each other once or twice a week, and when we're together, it's pretty great. He hasn't been repelled by my social awkwardness (on the contrary, he seems to find it quite endearing), or by the fact that I'm a massive geek with a penchant for linear RPGs and knitting. If our little romance was a movie, this part would be a sickly sweet montage to a happy nu-folk song. Seriously. He cooks amazing meals. We lie on the grass in his garden and watch squirrels chasing each other through the trees. I sit in his bed and write my blog, wearing one of his shirts, slamming down the lid of my laptop whenever he gets too close (because if he read it, that would be the worst thing ever). Hell, we even spoon - which is a big deal for me, terrified as I am of intimacy. It's pretty bloody idyllic, really.   

So what's the problem, I hear you ask?

The other five or six nights a week, when I just don't hear from him, are the problem. And, no, I'm not one of those mental girls who wants to know what he's had for lunch, or sends messages going "What are you up to? Xxxxxx". I basically use text messages as a means of organising my life. If I want a chat, I'd much rather call or Skype. But I literally will not hear anything from him. We'll half-arrange something, and I'll text or call to find out what the plan is... And radio silence. Zilch. Nada.

Which is making me slowly turn into this:

Yeah, my phone has bunny ears. And what? 
The mental person who stares at their phone, willing it to receive a message (that isn't from my Ma). Not fun. I much preferred being cool-as-a-cucumber, always in control Mona with regard to my dating life. This new, insecure, "OH-EM-GEE, why hasn't he texted me back?" model of myself that is coming out of the woodwork totally disgusts me. 

He always comes through at the last minute, in that "Oh I'm so sorry! I thought I replied to this yesterday! This is the plan...", endearingly scatter-brained way which my friend B - who I'll tell you all about sometime - claims is just typical of "artsy" people. B tells me that we un-creative types cannot comprehend or change behaviour like this, but that we must just accept it. He says I just need to act cool, like it doesn't bother me, and learn to just go with the flow. 

Well bugger that for a bunch of bananas. I am neurotic. I am insecure. I NEED MORE THAN TWENTY MINUTES TO PLAN AN OUTFIT WHEN HE SUDDENLY RINGS TO TELL ME HE'S TAKING ME TO A FANCY RESTAURANT.  

So last week, I snapped, went a tad psycho-bitch on him, and explained to him in a cool and collected manner (just kidding, I went all shrill and startedspeakingreallyfast) that no, he could not see me that evening, as he hadn't gotten back to me, and so I had made alternate plans. He seemed a bit shocked by my mental-ness, but we saw each other later in the week, and as usual, it was wonderful; the usual rom-com worthy affair.

We then both left University for the Easter Holiday. I just expected to see him in three weeks, when we both head back to Manchester. To be honest, I was kind of looking forward to not having to worry about making plans with him, to a little interlude to the gut-wrenching angst I feel when I know we're doing something, but I don't know what, when or where (what can I say? I like plans).

Then I started getting texts from him. Little, chatty messages, which aren't actually planning anything (obvs, as I'm in Spain) but just want to know what I'm up to and if I'm having a nice holiday.  

Boys are weird.

If you could explain this MENTAL behaviour to me, I'd sure appreciate it. 

Mona.

21 comments:

  1. Oh dear, I totally know what you're talking about. I also like to plan things ahead and be prepared for certain things (e.g. like going out to a nice restaurant or else), but on the other hand I'm a sucker for spontaneous.. meetings.
    Doesn't make sense at all, I know. Boy knows that already, so he tells me what he's doing and what his plans are and I'm less worried about not hearing from him ('well and then I'm in Germany and then I'm on a bike trip, but on ... I'll be back, so you don't have to worry'). He only learned doing so, because I was being bitchy and having a rant about how he doesn't call at all (in a busy week which I didn't know of lol).

    So what can I say? Do what makes you feel good and enjoy the moments you have together, forget about the rest, it's just not necessary for our beautiful heads to worry about it. And if they like us, they also take in the crazy blows ;)

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    1. Solid advice, as always, dear. I'm trying to just relax and be more of a spontaneous person, it just doesn't come very naturally to me! Also, I think boys fail to appreciate quite how long it takes me to get dolled up and look presentable.

      He seems to be dealing with my crazy quite well... And it sounds like you've got your man well-trained!

      Mona x

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  2. Pfff I used to be (and still am, I think) just like you. I mean, seriously, not hearing from your boyfriend for six days is the longest. time. ever. I'd probably go all possessive on his ass and ask why he has not texted me back sooner. I think you're doing a pretty good job handling these things.

    But then why would you worry? The boy obviously likes you so I think it's best to just give him the space he's taking and trust on the fact that he's crazy about you. :)

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    1. Haha thank you Sabrina! The problem isn't worrying that he doesn't like me (although I find it fairly astounding that he does), it's more just that I HATE not being able to plan my life... I know... I'm so anal!

      Thanks for the follow, darling.

      Mona x

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  3. I guess he just misses you as he knows he can't just go and see you whilst you're in Spain ?

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    1. I suppose so... I find the whole thing most confusing!

      Mona x

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  4. I definitely can't explain any boys behaviour! I would probably get a little annoyed too.
    xxx

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    1. I think I just need to accept that they will forever be a mystery to me, and just stop trying to analyse things!

      Mona x

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  5. I totally agree, boys are sooo weird! I've been with mine for 3 years, and I honestly am no closer to understanding them! x

    http://snwears.blogspot.co.uk/

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    1. p.s. your phone case is like the coolest thing I have ever seen. x

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    2. pps. second this also

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    3. Thanks guys! It also has a fluffy tail-stand, it's SO kitsch but I adore it!

      Mona x

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  6. Eugh, I second that. Boys. Are. Weird. Though at least, it sounds like he likes you! And then you can move in together, and he can take your outfit posts, and then he can maybe do male wishlists on your blog at christmas time, and then you'll get married and I'll probably squeal and jump up and down because I totally got you guys together with this slightly bizarre and over the top comment.

    Anwyay.

    Pip x

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    1. God you make me laugh Pip. I'll pitch it as an idea to him...

      Mona x

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  7. I FEEL YOUR PAIN. Seriously, you sound like you're writing the story of my life . I don't have a spontaneous bone in my body. But it sounds like you going a tad psycho-bitch was the kick up the arse that he needed! Sometimes, the trouble with boys is they just don't think. They're so laid back about everything, mostly thinking about playing guitars/football/playstation, or whatever! They need guidance haha xxx

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    1. I think you might be right. I suppose the trick is in giving them a kick up the arse, but subtley, so they don't know it's happening and can't call you controlling. I obviously failed in that department.

      Mona x

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  8. I just stumbled upon your blog and have spent the past hours (I have no idea the length of time as I was truly engrossed) reading all your past blog posts. You have an awesome blog and seem like a person I wish I knew in the real world. Thank you for providing a welcome happy distraction from my dissertation hell. I didn't have the guts to email you this, sorry for the ramble. Your blog is loved and bookmarked.

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    1. Thank you so much! There was no need to feel shy about emailing, I love hearing from people who read my blog, and this is honestly one of the loveliest comments I've ever gotten! Good luck with your dissertation!

      Mona x

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  9. When you find yourself falling for someone you literally go insane- Do things you'd never do, say things you'd never say, be that person you said you wouldn't be. Its nuts. Loca! Hence the saying- Crazy in Love. Boys are weird. Girls are physcos. I feel your pain.

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    1. Indeed. Its most inconvenient.

      Mona x

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  10. I can't explain this mental behaviour to you but this was hillarious! :)

    http://beautyfulladdict.blogspot.com/

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