Saturday, 25 February 2012

Here are a few choice titbits of embarrassing things that I have done in front of the boy that I fancy. Just because I'm mortified, doesn't mean that you guys don't deserve a couple of laughs...

1. Laughed so hard whilst trying to drink tea that I snorted it all over him. Yup, he was sitting across the table from me, looking mildly horrified, face dripping with my nose-tea. Classic.

2. Set a little bit of my fringe ablaze trying to light a cigarette. The dangers of smoking. His room apparently still smells a bit like charred hair.

3. Tripped walking up the steps outside his house. Yes, not even down. Up. I blamed it on my knee brace, but actually, it's just because I'm an idiot.

4. Gotten so lost in his mesmerisingly blue eyes that I missed my mouth with my spoon, leaving me with ice cream smeared all over my nose.

5. Accidentally flicked out a contact lens, which got stuck to my jumper. He was polite enough to pretend he hadn't noticed. 

6. Yesterday I tripped over his cat. Luckily, he didn't see me, and the cat remained unscathed (although the cat is now not a fan of me. Any cat whisperers out there, I need tips of how to make an angry cat like me please). 

7. Also yesterday, he spilt red wine on my magic jeans, and feeling awful, asked if they were new. I lied and said they were really, really old, and it didn't matter a bit. Please, Vanish Superspray, help me. 

I think that I am destined to die alone and be eaten by my pup. As I'm clearly not going to trick him into thinking I'm a wanton sex goddess, I guess I'll have to try for "adorably klutzy" instead.


Anyone else hugely embarrassed themselves, and fancy sharing? Go on, it's therapeutic (probably)...

Mona (future village spinster).


  1. Oh girl, you're really not alone! :D I could tell you a hundred crazy things I've done. :D

    P.S. I'd be really happy if you entered my giveaway here:


  2. Oh Mona! Did you at least have a good night? The poor, poor magic jeans.. though if you made it to being invited into his house thats kind of a good sign?

    Despite feeling your cringe for you, this also made me laugh quite a bit (sorry)

    Also! Advice on cats.. take it some cat treats, they're quite cheap and cats will forever love you for it. Chicken and cheese whiskers temptations are always a huge hit. Also, us cat lovers absolutely adore people that treat our cats with love. Many, many brownie points cant be earned this way! Just make sure the boy see's you being all kind and adorable with kitty

  3. This made me laugh! I'm glad I'm not the only awkward person on Earth. :D

  4. I constantly fall up stairs, so much so it's now part of my daily routine! x

  5. Haha!! I am glad I'm not the only one who suffers like this. My worst date involved me falling over on to my knees in front of a completely naked man in front of a whole pub full of people! Yes, there was a naked man in the pub...

  6. Thank you so much, girls, for making me feel like I'm not the only Spannerhead out there...

    Merlo84, I'm so intrigued!

    Mona x

  7. Haha, I just discovered your blog and I must say: I love your writing style! :D
    Sounds like me. If I get nervous or go on a date I tend to be so clumsy! Or I talk so much and so fast that the other person thinks I'm crazy and tries to leave at the very next second.

  8. this actually sounds like an extract from a book, you're really entertaining


All love notes are gratefully received. If you have a burning question, though, it would be better to hit me up with an email.

Mona x

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